Life's a Load of Second Chances

From where I sit in our California king, listening to Christa Wells and the sound of my dryer in the laundry room next door, life is... so good. It's a load of the kids clothes, towels, toddler shirts, mommy jeans, and dish towels. It's a full day of dirt and crumbs and sweat and snot. I've never loved doing laundry so much in my life.

Pictures like this are rare, so I have to post it! 

If you know me well, you've probably heard me complain about laundry at some point or another. But I can honestly say that I've recently undergone a transformation of sorts in my attitude towards this ongoing, never ending task. Not because I've found a new detergent that I love or dryer sheets that leave my clothes smelling like heaven (in fact I've recently decided to stop using dryer sheets altogether).

No, I think it's the Lord who's working on me. He has seen me in my dispair on those really long days when I am at my end with whiny toddlers. He's seen me angry. He's seen me examining all my new gray hairs and naming each one after an incident that day. He's seen me fall asleep on the floor in the twins bedroom when I'm waiting for them to fall asleep. And instead of throwing me out for the dirt smudges all over myself, the stains and the tears, he's throwing me in the wash, mending me, and making me new. Yep, God's doing laundry, too (and I'm pretty sure He doesn't use dryer sheets either).

My heavenly Father loves me enough (and He is ironic enough) to use something as mundane as laundry to wake me up and enjoy the journey of motherhood.  I am so thankful.

Life is a load of second chances. And third chances. And fourth chances... . You get the picture.

Of Mice and Little Men

Yesterday, the boys really impressed me a number of times. Once when I was sitting in a chair that Isaac wanted to sit in, he actually said "Excuse me." If you know my boys and their speech delay, I was so happy to hear such a polite request from him. Both boys have been doing so well with their alphabet and counting, sometimes all the way up to 20!

When I was getting ready to take the kids on a walk, I took them into the garage, buckled Bri into the wagon so she couldn't get in to anything, propped open the garage door so I could audibly keep tabs on what was going on. I ran back into the house to use the bathroom, also propping open that door - you can never be too safe with twin toddlers on the loose, grab the bag of diapers, and put on my shoes.

As I walked back to the garage, Elijah and Isaac came excited in to the house. Isaac was dangling something in his hand as he said proudly, "Mouse! Mouse!" At first I thought perhaps it was a toy mouse. And then I realized we didn't have a toy mouse.

"Put it down! Put it down! Put it down!" I screamed rather hysterically.

The boys looked pretty confused because usually when I find things like lizards, centipedes, or especially large spiders, I try to catch them safely and show the boys with some enthusiasm. But that is when I catch them... .

I shook Isaac's hand until the mouse fell to the floor (I was so thankful it was lying still and not just "mostly dead"). Then I made the boy wash their hands immediately, threatened them not to touch the mouse, and promptly grabbed a napkin to safely pick up the mouse and throw it to its final resting place over the fence in the backyard.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right? The next video is just for fun. I'm not sure who to give credit to, but you can find this on youtube.

If there was a MasterCard commercial of my past few days: 

finding poop in the laundry basket - 15 minutes of frustration and changing both boys

intercepting helpful 2-year-old emptying the bread bag - 20 seconds to place the bread back in the bag

milk cup spilled on kitchen floor - 2 minutes to clean (don't worry, no one cried over this spilled milk)

pants and shirts all out on the floor again - 30 minutes to refold

juice cup spilled in the dining room - 1 minute 33 seconds to clean

major double tantrum - 20 minutes of what-in-the-world-am-I-supposed-to-do

sitting on sister - 2 seconds to say "Get off of her!"

taking over an hour to fall asleep at nap time - 70 minutes scratching a back

toddler screaming at 11:27pm - 20 minutes to calm him and give him some "blue juice"

another toddler screaming at 3:15am -  3 minutes to take down the double gate, pull the screaming toddler's blanket out from under sound-asleep brother and put up the top gate again.

Spending time with the kids, jumping in rain puddles, and then later lying on a blanket on the lawn reading books, scratching backs and cuddling under the sun - PRICELESS!

It has been a full week. I'm sure I could add a couple more things, but it's too early and I haven't been able to retain as much in my mommy brain as I once could.

Mom, if you're reading this - thank you for your help, encouragement, prayers, patience, and availability to watch the kids. The hazelnut coffee was so thoughtful yesterday. I love you!

Keep the laundry going, everyone. Keep the laundry going!

"Words are the fabric of the universe."

I was reminded today of a phrase that one of Ben and my marriage counselors, Rob Shelton, used to describe the importance of the vows we were going to make. I'm not sure if he coined the phrase or borrowed it, but either way, we'll never forget what he said,

"Words are the fabric of the universe." 

He told us that  it was with words that God created the world and with His Word, that He is holding the world together. And it was with our own words that we were to promise to love and cherish each other. With words we can either build each other up, or tear each other down. Build bridges or burn them.

That concept of words being the very fabric that knits our lives together has really stuck with both of us. When we first had the boys and were talking through what we wanted to do with them for a nightly routine, we decided we wanted to say blessings for them each night. I grew up with parents who prayed with me every night before bed, and I think Ben had a similar experience. We wanted to take some of what we loved about our childhoods and give it a Ben & Amber Warner twist, so we now routinely say blessings for our kids every night before bed. We have each developed our own flavor of blessing so to speak, or specific things we cover.

My version of a bedtime blessing usually incorporates sleeping "all through the night, having sweet dreams, waking up cheerful" (the sweet dreams and cheerful aspects I stole from my mom who always prayed that for me), and then I add:

May you love the Lord your God 

with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength,

And your neighbor as yourself

May you look not only to your own interest

But to the needs of others

And follow Jesus,

Leading others to follow Him.

Clearly I have meshed together a few different scriptures... and I'm sure more will be added as we go. Each time I repeat this blessing, I purposefully pray each word as I say it, I look into their eyes, touch their hearts, their foreheads, and make muscle arms. Sometimes I pause to see if the boys will fill in the blanks, and sometimes they do. 

Ben has his own routine with them in which he asks them questions, almost like a toddler catechism, but it is something he made up to do with them. I haven't memorized his questions yet, but I believe they are something like this:

Who made you? God 

Why did He make you? To be His friend and to bring Him glory

Does God love you? Very much

How do we know that God loves you? The Bible 

Do you know a song about that? ... and then we sing Jesus Loves Me

Lord, please use our words - those spoken in blessings, and throughout the day - 

to knit our children's lives according to your will. 

Why the picture of Elijah & Isaac's dresser you ask? This morning when we had finished getting ready ourselves and went to get the kids, we were surprised to find the light on in their room... . Not the main light which could possibly be reached if they use something as a stepping stool to get to the light switch - it was the lamp. Which is at the top of their dresser. Where were the boys? Sitting in that open drawer pictured. And all the clothes were strewn across the floor. Thankfully the entire dresser didn't collapse on them! My first instinct was to run and get my camera, but I held myself back. They had to know this was wrong. I called Ben in, and he took care of disciplining the boys since Abrielle was also awake and crying in her room. Ben had the boys put all the clothes away as well as two-year-old's can, back into the dresser. I still haven't had time to refold all the shirts, I've only stuffed them back in the drawer.

I'm surprised it has taken the boys this long to figure out how to get to the lamp on the dresser. I hope they forget about it quickly. But just in case they don't, I think I'll hold off on refolding all the shirts. I'll give it a few days.

My kids enjoyed bumper cars in the driveway today. The boys probably enjoyed it a bit more than Abrielle because she is actually sitting in a poopy diaper in this picture. Yes, I knew it was poopy. And yes, I continued to push them around in the car. There were too many giggles to stop for a diaper change. I knew it would mean more of a mess (and it did), but it was worth it.

The brown-nosed dog pictured was loving fed rain puddle this afternoon by Elijah. He's recently into feeding his pretend animals. This is the first time he decided to give one of his little pets a drink of mud water, but I'm pretty sure the dog enjoyed it. Doggy is currently in the washer, along with Abrielle's poopy clothes from this afternoon, the boys' muddy pants from our walk to meet Daddy down the dirt road when he came home tonight, some dish rags, and my own clothes that were soiled in the mud.

A full load of laundry = A good day!

Ridiculous O'clock

Last week Ben and I were up early every morning. He is usually up by 4am to study Greek and have his time alone reading and praying. He is so disciplined in that way! For a while I have insisted that while he needs to do that in order to study, I really do not have to get up at ridiculous o-clock to fit in my own devotional time.

I got up at 5:43am. It's 6:30am, I'm already showered and ready for the day, but I'm realizing that it is already too late to put together a cognitive blog. The boys are opening and shutting their bedroom door which is adjacent to the baby's, so naturally she is crying... and this has been going on for a while.  It has become painfully obvious to me that rising at an early hour is the only way to even begin to accomplish the things that I hope for - time alone, time reading scripture, time praying, and hopefully one of these days exercise....

I am reminded of a verse that I read last week, when I cracked open my Bible asking God to help me get out of bed. God has a sense of humor. No joke, I opened it up to Ephesians 5:14 - 17 which reads like this in the ESV version of the Bible:

"Awake O Sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." 
Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.


What stood out to me the most? Making the best use of the time. My time as a mother of young children is short, however long it seems on many days. I have never thought of applying this portion of scripture to household responsibilities or motherhood, but it was so clear to me last week, and is today that the best use of my time right now is in keeping life going, and encouraging and nourishing my family. And apparently, in getting up early.

Teething & smelly blankets

It's amazing to me how much easier it is to get up in the morning, even at an early hour (4:45am), when you've had a solid night of sleep, than it is to get up a little later (6am) after you've had a choppy night's sleep with a teething baby. Last night Abrielle woke up screaming at 3am. I'm usually the type to let a crying baby cry it out a while, but not when the crying is this intense. The poor thing just cut three teeth a week and a half ago, and now has two more coming through. That's gotta hurt. So, the entire process of getting up, trying to find her baby meds and teething pellets, calming her down, reluctantly nursing her (not a good idea to do for babies who already sleep through the night), stroking her little head to calm her, finally calming her, walking back to the bedroom, realizing I need to go to the bathroom, getting back between the sheets, and then re-entering the dream world took approximately 45min.

Needless to say, I was emotionally very sad this morning when I made my bed.
"See you later, comfy bed."

Speaking of bedsheets, I think it's time to wash some sheets in this house, and some certain "kets" as Elijah calls them. You know it's time when you're kissing your darlings head and a funny smell wafts up from their precious blanket.

I'd like to start some discussion on here, so if you have the time: How do you keep your laundry going? Is there a method to your daily, weekly, monthly routines? Do tell!

Laundry and the birth of a blog

Sometimes I daydream about winning the lottery, becoming an instant celebrity, or being the lucky one-millionth shopper at Safeway rewarded with a year’s worth of groceries for my family. And sometimes, like a few mornings ago, I imagine what it would be like to be suddenly on my deathbed – the thoughts, feelings, and emotions. The fears that would be going through my mind, and the hope of complete rest on the other side. To be completely honest, this daydream becomes more frequent the more tiring life becomes with young children. It’s not a death-wish, but rather a very strong desire to be lying down, and sometimes it seems the only viable excuse for a mother of multiple preschoolers to lie down is if she is deathly ill.

Anyway, in my wide-awake dream that morning, I had some last words that caught me off guard. I was holding my husband’s hands and looking seriously into his loving eyes as I said faintly, yet passionately, “Keep… the laundry...going… .” Romantic, right?

I started laughing at myself in the shower. “That’s all you could come up with, Warner?” I thought to myself. But then I thought some more and realized that I had finally had a breakthrough.

Laundry, out of all other household tasks, has been my most dreaded task. Not because I don’t like touching soiled clothes, or because I hate folding them and putting them away, or because I frequently shrink the best articles of clothing we own (all true). The reason I loathe laundry is because it is a chore that is never completely done. No matter how many loads get done in a day, another load is waiting in the wings, or rather on sweaty bodies sleeping in their beds.

But it occurred to me this morning that finishing the laundry is not the chore. Keeping the laundry going is – and it is worth it. Because every soiled onesie and sweaty jersey represents life and all of life’s activities. Life gets messy, and that’s good. All the washing, drying, folding, and putting away is so that life may continue.

This blog is about embracing life, even the seemingly mundane aspects of it. I’ve never kept a personal blog before, but here it goes. We’ll see if I can keep it going!